The "Terrible Curse"

Vaeira

Someone is nasty, and calls you lazy.
You seethe inside, and it drives you crazy.

You scream and shout, something nasty back.
Then he proceeds once more, to attack.

You surmise: "Getting angry back in turn, is the best solution.
And that 'putting him in his place,' will bring a resolution".

So you push harder, and then he pushes back.
A vicious cycle, of pointless attacks.

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The Egyptians saw a frog, struck it, and alas there were now two.
But a sensible person, would know what to do.

'Dont get angry, stop striking the frog, because it will only make things worse.'
Alas the Egyptions' anger acted, like a "terrrible curse".

Instead of stopping, they hit it again, and again and again.
One frog became two, then four, then eight then ten.

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Trying to solve conflicts by lashing out, is like pulling at a knot with all your might.
It only gets the knot, more and more tight.

What to do is to say things like..I don't appreciate that, take it easy on me, 
or please treat me like you would like to be treated.
To calm "the fire" usually that is all that is needed.

And things are much more likely to be resoved better, if you speak in a calm voice.
We can utilize the more effective method,  we do have the choice.
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Venting to someone else is great, if to calm down, is the ultimate objective
But the ideal, is to view any given source of anger, in proper perspective 

Like if someone in a checkout line is rude, or has a nasty comment to say
Think 'Who cares. It is a reflection on him not me. He must be having a bad day.' 

Because anger is like "gehenom", ruling the roost.
It is terribly unhealthy, and self abuse.

Blood pressure rises, enzymes take over, and get stronger and stronger.
Dear reader if you control your anger, you will live longer!

(Some reasearch says sugar in excess, is something to avoid.
To help one be less irritable angry, enraged and annoyed). 

No one said, it would be easy, to control.
And learning to control one's anger, is a lifetime goal.

So work hard at controlling your anger, and try to do your best.
And you will reap benefits in this world, not only in the next!

Return. But How?

Shabbos Hagadol

On erev Pesach we dismiss our sins (chametz), in one line.
"Kol chamira ... k'afra di'ara," that alone is just fine.

There is a minhag to do teshuva before the Seder. And there are those who do.
However, they spend on it, only a minute or two.

As far as chametz, it is a metaphor, for things done wrong.
And while by Yom Kippur by al chait, we spend longer and break out in somber song...

The Jews in Egypt on their door, were required to put a sign..
But as for excessive teshuva, this was not the time.

They were steeped in idol worship, and were at a level that was low.
So to get involved then in  excessive soul searching, that was not the way to go.

By Korban Pesach, viduy (confession) and semicha (leaning on the animal), is not performed.
Unlike the semicha, and viduy, which by other karbanos is the norm.

When we commemorate Korban Pesach with Afikoman, i.e. "going from slaves to being free."
We hurry. And that is the way it ought to be.

Teshuva is confusing. There is no one path one way.
What to confess-or not confess-what to say what not to say.

This Sefiras Ha'omer, whatever confessing you may need to do.
I wish you hatzlacha, in picking the path which is right for you!