Accepting "Anochi" and Not Looking Elsewhere. A Good Idea Without Doubt

Yisro

An ode to those who ask whether "man made G-d or G-d made man." 
Or wonder if G-d really took us out of Egypt, with an outstretched hand. 

Or, maybe they say, "Yes, I know G-d created the world and that is the way it seems.
But how do I know that He intervenes?"

It is fine to view nine of the commandments, as something which you can and cannot do.
To obey or disobey, the choice is up to you.

"Do not steal." "Don't be jealous." "Do not kill."  
Again we are obligated to keep them, yet, we have free will.

But, "I am The L-rd thy G-d who took you out of Egypt, where you were once slaves,"
Is not stated as a command, but a statement which to us H-shem gave. 

As all of the Jewish people by the above statement, literally saw H-shem's voice. 
The lesson is to view belief in H-shem and the Exodus, like it's an obligation not a choice. 

The lesson here, which is implied, 
Is to accept it as a fact: G-d created the world and took us out of Egypt. This cannot be denied. 
_____________________________________

Hinduism, Budhism, the "testament" which is new, 
Scientology, Communism, Atheism, just to name a few ...
  
Because, if you look for answers, in every belief and creed under the sun, 
It will take you many lifetimes, when all has been said and done!

But, don't get the idea that Judaism does not allow for those who have questions and are unsure. 
However, within the confines of Torah is the place to find the "cure".

It is just fine to have questions. You are not "bad"; it's nothing wrong. 
In fact, with hard work looking into Torah sources, your faith will become quite strong.

So, be ready for the challenge; work hard and persevere.
Because it may take some time, until things become clear.

Read books, from your local Jewish bookstore. 
Ask and discuss..until your doubts exist no more.  

Thousands before you have looked within Torah for the answers which they did find.
And for you, dear reader, I wish the same peace of mind.

Honor Your Parents. Don't Covet

Yisro

"A better mom and dad, I was denied.
With the ones I got, I am not satisfied. 

They condemned me, for the littlest thing. 
To this day, I still feel the sting.

They always lived, beyond their means. 
And they didn't encourage me, to pursue my dreams.

They sat by when I was picked on, by my older brother.
(After years of therapy, that is what I discovered.)

Everything I do by them, gets a negative spin. 
Is it any wonder, the lousy shape I am in?!
___________________________

But look at that family, over there. 
Zero dysfunction. As for me that feels unfair!

I look at another friend. What a sense of security and unconditional love he was given.
As for me...my parents will never be forgiven!"
__________________________

On rare cases parents are legendary; virtually as good at parenting as they possibly can be. 
Role models, of the highest degree.

Many try hard, and are basically good.
And though they don't always parent, the way that they should.

That there kid do great, on their personal wish list, there is nothing above. 
True they are imperfect, but they are full of love. 

Others have many shortcomings, and can be quite selfish at times, 
But they do love their kids. That is the bottom line. 

But, sadly there are some who are awful, and are the reason that their kids are in such pain. 
Sadly in adulthood, their children's scars remain
____________

In this parsha we speak of the two luchos or tablets, which came down from heaven. 
And we are told for example, commandment one corresponds with number six, commandment two with number seven.

The command on the left has a connection, with its corresponding command on the right.
And on a concept in Torah, it will shed some light.

For example ... belief in G-d is number one, number six is "Don't kill". 
This teaches that when people don't believe in G-d, chalila, people will be murdered at will.

"Honor thy father and mother ..." is command number five.
(Keep this, and you will merit, for a long time to stay alive.)

"Don't be jealous" is commandment number ten.
The lesson is this: If someone has better parents, don't be jealous of them! 

The parents you were given, are the  parents you were supposed to have - no others. 
(And while you are at it, tell that to your sister or brother). 

Thinking if only ... if only ... I would have had better parents my life wouldn't be as flawed as this!
Is tempting to think about, but that reality simply doesn't exist! 

To not wish for better parents, can be a difficult test. 
But do not be jealous of others parents. Honor your parents, and you will be blessed. 

Realize that there will always be better parents, that are not your own, 
And as for you, your destiny was to grow up in your parents' home.

All Good Things Must Come to an End?

Beshalach

The nevuah at the Yam Suf, that the Jews did receive..
Was so spiritually sublime, that they did not want to leave.

It felt wonderful, plus now the Egyptians would be a thing of the past.
But a prophesy that intense, could not last

To us today a message it does send ...

The intensity of learning Torah full time in kolel, makes one feel like they are in "heaven".
Shtieging over Rishonim and Achronim 24/7

A young woman, sends letters home..
Saying, 'A joy learning Torah like this, I have never known!'

But alas all good things must come to an end..

Their experience of intense learning, usually does not last forever.
And now one must deal, with more "mundane" endeavors.

Like men for instance must make a parnasa, not necessarily your number one thing you'd like to do.
And you don't feel nearly as fulfilled, when the day is through.

The Jews who were in Egypt, we are like them.
It is not always about spiritual "ecstasy". It is about doing the ratzon H-shem.

Of course the sublime experience by the Yam Suf would  not last.
And the nevuah and such closeness to H-shem would be a thing of  the past. 

Later they would be in the midbar, and often fail.
And eventually merit to be farmers, in Eretz Yisroel.

So true being a kolel yungerman, or girl in seminary is a sublime life.
But there is nothing quite like building a bayis ne'eman biyisroel, with a husband or wife! 

Poseik Safeik

Beshalach

Gematrias are brilliant. Gematrias are fun.
Providing a pearl of wisdom, for old and young.

This parsha speaks of the nation of Amaleik, as evil as evil can be.
Amaleik bigematria equals the word safaik, (doubt), a valuable lesson to us indeed.

"Amaleik": "ayin," "mem," "lamed," and "kuf" equals 240 and "safeik": "samech," "peih," and "kuf," does too.
Amaleikim are terrible, but it can be terrible when doubts arise, and one is forced to choose.

Like having to choose the right doctor, surgeon, or medical treatment plan of any kind,
Which can induce fear, guilt, and indecisiveness and even frazzle the mind.

Just how to cure a loved one, just which path to take
'I am so scared. Am I making a mistake?'

Shidduchim can be torturous. Will  he or she make a good husband or wife?
'This is the most important, decision of my life!'

'Am I choosing the right profession, or yeshiva for my son?'
Because a school will mold my son's personality, when all is said and done.

Dear reader, there is only one thing which I can advise.
It is from the Torah, and it is very  wise.

The words "psak" and "safeik" have the same letters.
(The letters "samech" and "peah" are interchanged, but remain together.)

A poseik (religious authority) will give a psak whether an eiruv is kosher, or on a life and death decision.
With confidence, surety, and precision.

You ask a question of a poseik, who is sometimes young or sometimes older.
Which provides relief, because the safeik is now upon his shoulders!

Yes medical decisions or decisions about dating are anguishing, and "no walk in the park,"
But if you ask your rav (or poseik), you are no longer in the dark.

True, you're probably not going to ask a shailah about by your next simcha what to serve.
But, about the serious doubts, by all means ask, it's a G-d given right which you deserve! 

When Moons Can Not Be Seen

Bo

The moon was created, day four of creation.
And was the first mitzva for us, as a collective nation.

You see, H-shem said to Moshe,"Proclaim the new moon on its precise day." 
(Later as now, it would be calculated on the thirtieth or thirty-first day.)

On some nights as one looks up, even when it's a cloudless sky.
The moon is not visible, to the naked eye.

But then a little over two weeks later, precisely on key.
(If it is not cloudy) sure enough a full moon so bright, and easy to see.

Needless to say we know every month, a full moon will return in all its glory.
But that any given galus will end, is an entirely different story!

But H-shem is telling us to realize that, just as the moon waxes and wains.
The exile you are now in, will not remain.  

Times like "bitter herbs", change to times more fine.
And sometimes we live as a nation, "which always reclines".

"A dog, a cat, a stick made of wood".
Times in our history can change so quickly, from bad to good!

In the midst of a galus, it is a difficult endeavor.
To internalize, 'This galus will pass, and it will not last forever!"   

It is not an easy thing to do.
But it has been done with unfathomable emunah, by a chosen few.

The Chashmonaim, during their darkest days.
Knew they would return to the Beis Hamikdosh, to offer praise.

For they knew we Jews are like the moon, which at times seems like it disappears .
Only to later shine in the night, so bright and clear.

But "Woe to us, this is how it forever will be".
Too often our cry, throughout history.

Author Victor Frankl spoke of people, who in the death camps, thought things would always be the same.
It is hard to imagine, such excruciating pain.

Others were more fortunate, and managed to sing Ani Ma'amin in valiant song.
As they somehow transcended their current situation, and remained strong.

They knew that the most bitter exiles, come to an end. 
Maybe that is how, they could transcend.
______________________________

So where are we today?

Quite recently I heard speakers from Arachim, which has been around for several years.
Whose fifteen minute film presentation, could bring one to joyous tears.

They showed some Jews who were anti-religious, so many who simply didn't know.
Beginning to serve H-shem, like their ancestors in this week's parsha Bo.
  
So maybe this is all an indication that redemption, very soon lies ahead. 
(Spoken in  prophesies that these days, are often said.)

Maybe we are close to the time, of no more nights when "moons cannot be seen".
Es shivas tzion, hayeinu kicholmim.

A day not unlike a full moon, whose brilliance in the night sky, will forever remain.
The time of Mashiach tzidkeinu bimhaira biyamainu amain!

A World of Perfect Imperfection

Vaeira

Pharaoh was told, that the Jews would be redeemed.
To Pharaoh it didn't make sense, for to him it seemed ...

That if H-shem was All Powerful, Moshe would not have problems when he would speak.
The fact that Moshe Rabbeinu had a speech impediment, to Pharaoh meant (chalilah) that H-shem was weak.

Pharaoh thought that if H-shem could do everything, no one would be handicapped.
The world would be perfect; nothing would be lacked.
______________

Some who see, a world of imperfections and flaws,
Think (chalilah) that The Aibershter's "limitations" are the cause.

This thought has persisted through the ages,
Often by people who think we are descended from primates, that we should live in cages!
_______________

But when we see a desert, where nothing can grow,
The reason why, is not for us to know. 

It doesn't (chas vishalom) mean that H-shem does not have the power
To bring rain to quench the desert thirst, at any given hour.

And, if there is a bird that for some reason cannot sing a sweet song,
It does not mean that H-shem (chas vishalom) is not really strong!

When things are imperfect, it may cause us to ask why,
Like, why can't H-shem cure illnesses, which cause people to die.

"H-shem is imperfect," in an hour of desperation some might say,
And feel G-d forbid, that it is useless to pray.

Of course H-shem is all powerful, with a master plan.
But why imperfection exists in this world, it can be hard to understand.

Yes, despite death and all the world's imperfections and pain,
That thought that H-shem is All Powerful in our minds as we daven must always remain

The "Terrible Curse"

Vaeira

Someone is nasty, and calls you lazy.
You seethe inside, and it drives you crazy.

You scream and shout, something nasty back.
Then he proceeds once more, to attack.

You surmise: "Getting angry back in turn, is the best solution.
And that 'putting him in his place,' will bring a resolution".

So you push harder, and then he pushes back.
A vicious cycle, of pointless attacks.

______________

The Egyptians saw a frog, struck it, and alas there were now two.
But a sensible person, would know what to do.

'Dont get angry, stop striking the frog, because it will only make things worse.'
Alas the Egyptions' anger acted, like a "terrrible curse".

Instead of stopping, they hit it again, and again and again.
One frog became two, then four, then eight then ten.

_________________


Trying to solve conflicts by lashing out, is like pulling at a knot with all your might.
It only gets the knot, more and more tight.

What to do is to say things like..I don't appreciate that, take it easy on me, 
or please treat me like you would like to be treated.
To calm "the fire" usually that is all that is needed.

And things are much more likely to be resoved better, if you speak in a calm voice.
We can utilize the more effective method,  we do have the choice.
______________

Venting to someone else is great, if to calm down, is the ultimate objective
But the ideal, is to view any given source of anger, in proper perspective 

Like if someone in a checkout line is rude, or has a nasty comment to say
Think 'Who cares. It is a reflection on him not me. He must be having a bad day.' 

Because anger is like "gehenom", ruling the roost.
It is terribly unhealthy, and self abuse.

Blood pressure rises, enzymes take over, and get stronger and stronger.
Dear reader if you control your anger, you will live longer!

(Some reasearch says sugar in excess, is something to avoid.
To help one be less irritable angry, enraged and annoyed). 

No one said, it would be easy, to control.
And learning to control one's anger, is a lifetime goal.

So work hard at controlling your anger, and try to do your best.
And you will reap benefits in this world, not only in the next!

The "Final Date"

Shemos

I chose exactly, what I should wear.
Not too conservative, but not too much flair.

I tried to look pleasant, and not uptight.
Praying for once, this would turn out right.

Be witty and interesting, don't say something wrong.
Don't come on too weak, don't come on too strong.

We went out to a restaurant, and before long I discovered.
This date was turning out, like a lot of others.

Well I guess the date, went "OK".
We found we had some things in common, a few things to say.

Another date recorded, in my date history.
Just what went wrong, is a mystery.

Shidduch dating isn't always, a walk in the park.
Sometimes it is more like banging into furniture, in the dark.

My shadchan once again: "I could set you up again ... who knows maybe this will be the one ... and  then again what is ... I mean worst comes to worst....
"Talk to them once before the date, first things first."

So we e-mailed,  then talked, then set up the date.
I can't show up to early, mustn't show up too late.

No go again! I put my head, on my good friend's shoulder.
The one in whom I always confide, that I'm getting older.
___________

But don't get stuck in the here and now, never get depressed.
Even though the way things look to you now, your life seems like a mess.

Have faith that you will find that special someone, for whom you  pray.
Even though it may take a lot of dating, to get to that day.

And one day while riding, on the train.
Or while looking out, into a cool misty rain.

Or on that one day when you're out with someone, and you find. 
'He or she  is not really right for me, but we had a nice time!'

At that time you will keep your eye - not on a date that didn't work out - but on that "final date".
Who will be your partner through life, and your soul mate.
_______________________

There was a man named Moshe, Rabbeinu who was on a journey to save his nation.
The journey, the purpose, of creation.

There would be obstacles, setbacks, and things wouldn't happen over night.
But Moshe knew eventually, things would turn out right.

Moshe attitude was he must focus on Yetzias Mitzrayim, keeping his "eye on the prize".
Moshe's attitude is also a great one for shidduch dating, one must realize.

Whether it is your cousin, friend from seminary, or the guy who used to learn with your brother.
May all us singles meet  their zivug, one with the other.

Here's to the Good Old Days and Messianic Days

Vayikra

Today kids are exposed, to all sorts of things.
That living in the twenty-first century, brings.

Like the decadence of papers, sold in convenience stores.
Which don't even bother much, with real news anymore.

Kids innocently frolicking, outside on the grass
More and more, is becoming a thing of the past.

It has gotten so bad, that today our history "has turned a page".
(And kids do need to learn things, which defy their age).

So as time goes by, kids are becoming more jaded.
As more so, childhood innocence has faded.
______________________________

But in times, of hundreds of years ago.
All those "adult" things, Yiddishe kinder didn't know.

The world sheltered kids, from adult deception, evil and greed.
Because after all, that information a child didn't need.

Yes they were ignorant of adult vices and immorality. That was for sure.
So it didn't become part of them; They remained pure.

That's why when rebbes began teaching these souls, so innocent and mild.
They started with Sefer Vayikra. It was the first thing taught to a Jewish child.

Bringing up a sacrifice, in order to get closer to H-shem:
A concept as beautiful, and innocent as them.

Thus it came naturally, and perhaps by learning Vayikra they would stay innocent just a bit longer.
And in later years, when they would need to take on impurity, they would be stronger.

And when we actually will bring korbanos bikarov mamish just you wait and see.
Innocent and pure: That is the way kids will always be!

Return. But How?

Shabbos Hagadol

On erev Pesach we dismiss our sins (chametz), in one line.
"Kol chamira ... k'afra di'ara," that alone is just fine.

There is a minhag to do teshuva before the Seder. And there are those who do.
However, they spend on it, only a minute or two.

As far as chametz, it is a metaphor, for things done wrong.
And while by Yom Kippur by al chait, we spend longer and break out in somber song...

The Jews in Egypt on their door, were required to put a sign..
But as for excessive teshuva, this was not the time.

They were steeped in idol worship, and were at a level that was low.
So to get involved then in  excessive soul searching, that was not the way to go.

By Korban Pesach, viduy (confession) and semicha (leaning on the animal), is not performed.
Unlike the semicha, and viduy, which by other karbanos is the norm.

When we commemorate Korban Pesach with Afikoman, i.e. "going from slaves to being free."
We hurry. And that is the way it ought to be.

Teshuva is confusing. There is no one path one way.
What to confess-or not confess-what to say what not to say.

This Sefiras Ha'omer, whatever confessing you may need to do.
I wish you hatzlacha, in picking the path which is right for you!

Uh..Suri...? There Is Something I Just Have to Talk to You About

Acharei Mos - Kedoshim

"Oh Devorah, how well your son behaves."
Suri goes on and on, as she raves.

"But Basie, what's the story with your son?
He seems to start up, with everyone!

Well I guess keeping your cool while he acts up, is your test.
But don't worry Basie. In our book you're the best"

Basie leaves with a sour feeling.
'It seems with hurtful comments, I am always dealing.

People make comments and I stand there, not knowing what to say.
Then hurt and upset, is how I stay.

Oh but what am I saying? Suri is my friend.
I should put all this resentment, to an end.

Why should I feel upset, and hold on to how I feel?
It was an innocent comment. No big deal!

On second thought..who am I kidding? I feel insulted and betrayed.
I've got to face it. I do feel hurt by the comments Suri made.'
__________________________

Frustrated, Basie goes to her rav, Rav Smith to see what to do.
After the two of them talk for a while, he concludes.

"Basie I can tell that comment about your son always misbehaving, hurt you inside.
You are the sensitive type. So your feelings mustn't be denied.

For some it is a mitzva to ignore insults; because for them they are no big deal.
But let's face it. That is not the way that you feel.

Right now your friendship with Suri is blemished. That's not right.
So why not speak to her, and why not do that tonight."

That afternoon Basie quivers, as she practices in the mirror.
As that Rav Smith is right, it becomes clearer and clearer.  
________________

The phone rings: "Suri? This is Basie. Um I think there is something we must work through."
"Oh Basie How've you been? It is great hearing from you!

Did you hear? Devorah's daughter became a kallah yesterday."
"Oh wow that's great!.. But wait ...There is something I have got to say."

"Well I have got to go soon," Suri says. "Will it take long?
Basie..Is something wrong?"

"Actually yes. I was hurt by the comment you made about my son. It made me upset."
"About your son? Refresh my memory. I seem to forget."

Basie proceeds to tell over the whole story.
"Oh I feel terrible," Suri exclaims. "Oh Basie I am so sorry!"

Basie now feels no more anger, resentment or hate.
As tomorrow the two of them have lunch, and everything goes great.
_______________

This parsha says if you hate in your heart speak up.(And like Basie prepare what you are going to say.)
With any luck you and your friend will become even closer, and all bitterness will melt away!

Emor

Emor


To your dear friend, you do harm.
And I accept you back, with open arms.

You don't find, time to learn.
And My blessing and kindness, is what you earn.

You don't confide in Me, when you pray.
It's a case of mere words, which you say.

But when you daven, at any given hour.
I consider your words, to have great power.
_____________

Aibeshter you are able to punish, measure for measure.
You can erase in a mere moment, a rich man's treasure.

But as for me, I am so much more in awe.
Of how you treat us all, with so many flaws.

We sin and sin, and don't even give it a second glance.
And You proceed to bestow upon us earth's bounty, and chance after chance.

Knowing of Your infinite greatness, one would think You would punish instantly those who sin.
But You rarely act, according to midas hadin.

True it is one thing to consider how strong and powerful You are and it boggles the mind
But even more awesome is to behold how You are so forgiving and kind.

This week's parsha speaks of "Yom Tekiah" how to be merciful to sinners He feels the need. 
Considering H-shem's Infinite Greatness what an awesome concept indeed!

Behar-Bechukosai

The bell rings. Reuven answers the door.
He sees a man there, and says no more.

He beholds a weathered face, yet with twinkling eyes.
A man he does not recognize.

"Can you help me? My child is ill.
He has had several operations; He needs more still.

My other son had a nervous breakdown, and he is not doing well.
They told me he is not making progress, as far as they could tell."

Reuven reaches for his wallet, without hesitation.
As he gives the man, a generous donation.

Then he proceeds to speak to the man, for a short while.
Amazed, how he is even able to smile.

Reuven asks, as he cannot understand.
How he stays so positive, with the situation at hand.

He laughs and says, "This is decreed for me what can I do?
It is bitachon which every day sees me through."

As the man goes on, and begins to explain.
His astonishment Reuven can barely contain.

"H-shem gives me, what He knows for me is the best.
To accept it with love ...That is my test!"

Reuven goes back up his steps ashamed.
He thinks: 'When something even a little bad happens to me all I do is complain!

How often when I actually do sacrifice and do what's right.
I feel I'll lose out, and get all uptight.'

This weeks Haftorah speaks of bitachon. And in bitachon there are levels.
To have even a  small amount of bitachon is wonderful, and reason to revel.

The next time Reuven was stuck in unexpected traffic, or on an unusually slow train.
He learned from his encounter with the man, and did not complain.

And when a small appliance for positively absolutely, no good reason broke down. 
He said, 'This is what is the best for me,' and did not frown.

And when as if by "magic" out of nowhere he found a parking place when he was in a hurry.
'Of course H-shem desires to bestow good upon us,' he thought. 'So why should I worry?'

True unlike the man collecting, Reuven didn't have bitachon like mountains of diamonds and gold.
But any amount of bitachon is valuable. So we are told.